I’ve recently been re-watching some of my favorite films from my youth with a careful eye towards how they appeal (or don’t) to me now. So without further ado…
First and foremost, people have the Indiana Jones thing a little backwards. I refer specifically to the attacks on Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (in line with the attacks on the new Star Wars films…) Way off base! The real stinker in this series is Temple of Doom. I love Raiders of the Lost Ark probably more now than when I was a kid – just a plain great movie! The Last Crusade is still probably my favorite of the series. Temple of Doom…? If this movie was a stand-alone, I would rate it just a notch above that all-time love-to-hate-it stinkfest Howard The Duck. In fact, I rate it so anyway – it sucks! I couldn’t understand why I remembered so little of this movie from when I watched it as a kid. Now I know why: there’s hardly anything worth remembering save for a heart ripping scene or two and a little monkey brain for dessert!
As for Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I like it. A lot: it’s a decent movie that, when watched alongside the first three, I feel stands right up beside them.
I recently had the pleasure of watching what was, when the eighties were still in full swing, one of my favorite movies: Flight of the Navigator. I was really scared this one would end up on the sucky stinker list, but it really is a decent movie! Yes, there is a little Disney corniness after Max uploads the kid’s brain and starts acting goofy, but it wasn’t in an irritating way, I felt. (Well, not too much so anyway.) I really was surprised at how much I enjoyed this movie even today. I occasionally hear rumors of a remake… I hope it doesn’t suck. Flying an alien ship = cool. NASA and alien conspiracies = cool. Ending up in the wrong year = cool. Stupid annoying kids and their toys/extensive CGI and unnecessary explosion/action/chase scenes = (ARE YOU LISTENING REMAKERS?) = sucky. Please, keep the pop trends down and stick to a good, enticing, psychologically gripping story, okay?
I am saddened to say that a couple years ago I had the opportunity to finally re-watch Return to Endor and that other Ewok movie no one can ever really remember. I am saddened because they suck. I’m sorry. I can’t describe without any loss of dignity just how much I loved these movies when I was a kid, but now… Man, was I disappointed. Really upset about this. Going to just move on now…
I did enjoy my recent viewing of Harry and the Hendersons. Yeah… you forgot all about that one, didn’t you? It’s still pretty decent I say.
There’s really no reason to get into recognized classics like Ghostbusters or Back to the Future, is there? Terminator? Didn’t think so. The Freddie and Jason movies…? Yeah, they live on, for better or worse.
One movie I’ve been wanting to re-watch but haven’t had the guts just yet is The Goonies. Any of you ’80s kids out there watch this one recently? Is it safe? I’m really hoping this one stands the test of time. Big Trouble in Little China is another one. Help me out here folks – anyone seen this recently? Is it still the greatest movie of all time? (Well okay, maybe it was never that great…) I did watch The Last Dragon a couple years ago… Not a stinker but certainly no where near as great as I remember it.
Is there some monster that goes around sucking the souls of the movies of my youth, leaving them suckass corny in its wake? Or was my taste that damned bad!? [I can't even watch the Police Academy series anymore... What the hell was I watching?? Was I a crack baby?!?! No, of course I was not. But I do remember liking this movie, which shall remain nameless on account of the fact I'm too ashamed to admit I don't even remember anything about it - did I even know what the heck was going on back then?]
While we’re on a sad nostalgia trip, anyone see Gia, that sad as hell movie about the eighties (or if not about the eighties, certainly the eighties and the situation occurring then plays a significant part in the life of an eighties up and coming star)? I made the mistake of watching this movie one New Years Eve – which is already the saddest night of the year… Talk about depressing! I was depressed until Spring!
Anywho… Fill in the blank box below with your suggestions for Eighties movies that either have stood the test of time or else turned out to be stinkers in disguise.